Fathering is one of the greatest joys of my life. There is always something to learn about your children. There is always something to do with your children.
For the most part, they are always coming up with the ideas to make the day fun, especially in an age where working to feed and take care of our families seems to take precedence over being available for our families.
Fathers naturally have a complex which causes us to believe that we must be everyone’s hero. Because of that we allow the pressures of work, society, and the desire to give our children the best in life to become more important than our mere presence.
Recently I underwent three surgeries which were related to my time spent active duty as a United States Marine. Due to those injuries my income became very restricted due to loosing over half of it during my recovery.
The Lord is so gracious and kind. My family and I witnessed the Lord truly as Jehovah-Jirah. He provided for us every day. We lived in abundance in a time that we should have seen decrease. In fact, we saw overflow during a pandemic. This was really the hand of God.
During that time, I was on bedrest and confined to my house. While this should be miserable, for me it was not. It gave me time to seek the Lord, see God save my marriage, and to spend much needed time bonding with my children.
One of the most important things that I learned during this down time was that my children need me present more than they need me to give them presents.
My mere presence was enough for them. My presence validated their existence, they were able to understand themselves through seeing who I am. I was able to see time slow down and teach them small things that only a father can. I taught my boys how to tie a tie, how to speak to women, and how to walk with pride. I taught my daughter how to shoot, understand the military and Law Enforcement, and how to be a strong and courageous woman.
Although these are things that I would have hopefully taught them over time, there is a chance that society would have taught them or forced them to learn it before I had a chance. If there is anything that I have learned growing up in a home without my father, it is that society is a mean teacher, and it is better to be taught by someone you love than someone who is there to suck life out of you.
This taught me another valuable lesson. God wants to be present in our lives as our Father, but often we don’t make time for Him.
No matter how busy you are in life, be intentional about finding days out of your schedule and your children’s schedule to slow the world down and just be present. Look into their eyes. Hear their hearts beat, let them hear your heartbeat. There is something about the presence of a Father that makes everything okay.
Secondly, make intentional time for Jesus. Slow the world down, if only for 5 mins in the morning or 5 mins in the evening, and let the Lord be present for you.
This lesson changed my life, and I hope it changes yours too.